PS22 Choir Singing Fleetwood Mac's "Landslide"

Aren't these children just everything? Have a great day, y'all!

This Kid's Got the Moves!

I. LOVE. THIS!

Jennifer Hudson Pregnant?

Miss Hudson, whom I refer to affectionately as Babyface, is reportedly having a baby of her own. I wish her the very, very best of everything.

Who'd like some of this?

Why would anyone think this is attractive? People play too much. And why is he posing from the middle down the same way an attractive woman in pointy stilettos would? I hate him!

Oh, and there are the profiles of others:

looking for a sweet woman to share what i like, must like watching wrestling, hunting fishing ,, oh and the packers. some who is kind, good sence of hummer, who is funny, someone who loves talking... go to a movie, go danceing, go to the new zoo, or cook super at my place and talk, or rent movies and order a pizza, or what ever the ladie wants to do, go walking on the (sic) river trails, or go to (sic) beach walk round and talk, go up to (sic) lodge, go for a bike ride, or go to a park and talk.

I am afraid of any woman who fits the first part of this disastrous profile. Yes, we can make jokes about the hummer, but sence of hummer? If you're not a good speller (that's bad enough, but perhaps I could work around it), would it kill you to spell-check your profile?

Please tell me it will get better. Bob? Clifton?

Please be Advised...

I am giving online dating another try. I already have enough material to write a book. It shall be a comedy with elements of tragedy, or vice versa. I'll keep you posted. Lord help us all.

Nineteen Pieces of Klou

Okay, I had been promising to share myself a long time ago, you know, in writing. Recently, Bob shared some information about himself and challenged me and others to do the same, thereby putting some much needed fire under me. This will be an ongoing project, and each time I'll give it a little spin. This time, I have provided my own response to each of Bob's subject matters, then added some of my own. Without further ado, here are 19 elements of me.

What a way to start this off...

1. I have a very dirty mouth. Many of you know about the Lenten Cuss Jar. Appropriately, however, I cannot stand to hear people use foul language in public, to hear people curse in front of children, or worse yet, at their children. It happens a lot where I live. That goes right through me, and it's vicious cycle that won’t easily be broken. I love the challenge of making my point under heated circumstances without using a naughty word.

2. I have been Catholic all my life. Actually, the choice was made for me before I was born. I struggled for awhile, but after serious reflection I recommitted to my religion, with a new clarity. This commitment is a far second to my spiritual commitment. I belong to a very imperfect religion that took a long, long time in acknowledging the horrible wrongdoings that occurred by people in power, and in taking steps to ensure such atrocities would never occur again. Unfortunately, the damage done in the past cannot be undone, but now is what counts. My relationship with God is mine and mine alone. He understands, accepts and loves me, faults and all. I have heard people say they avoid a relationship with God because of people, and to that I say, focus on your spirit, go where people accept you, and ignore anyone who tries to decide your relationship with God, for he loves you, and those people are the devil.

3. Every time I tell a lie, it backfires on me. Example: After Katrina, stressed, lonely, overworked and underappreciated, I told my doctor that I felt like killing my insurance claim adjuster and everyone in my office. Yes, I said those words. I knew I would never do that, but he didn’t. I wondered what kind of repercussions this would have on me, but I didn’t care at the time. It was the second lowest point in my life, but unlike the lowest point in my life, I didn't have the protection of being in shock. Everything worked my nerves. I was burned out and hostile. After determining I was no harm to myself (that seemed to be all he cared about - love him for that), he prescribed an antidepressant. After reading the side effects, I felt being crazy wasn't so bad after all, and wine would suffice in seeing me through it (it did indeed). When I returned to the doctor, I just couldn't tell him I wasn't taking the medication after such drama, so I lied. When asked, I told him that on a scale of 1-10, I was a six, where I had previously been a two. He immediately said I should be a nine or ten, upped the dosage and scheduled a follow-up, which would include bloodwork. I was sure to be found out then. This type of thing always happens when I lie, and I do my best to avoid it.

(I never went back for the bloodwork. He's still my doctor, a very good one, and is himself a little crazy. This endears him to me, of course).

4. High school was probably one of the most painful times of my life. While there were some good times, laughs and memories, when I think of those years (at school and home), I am mostly reminded of pain, misery, frustration, rejection, and never feeling like I belonged anywhere. It just depresses me. There is not a thing you can offer me to make me relive one day of my high school years. Why? 'Cause I'm all grown up and happy now, bitches!

5. You want me to come to your defense very quickly? I'm talking, ready to fight any and everybody messing with you? Let me even think you're the underdog. I will slay a dragon for you.

6. At one time in my life, I was a voracious reader. Not anymore. I believe I have been ruined by this here WebNet thing and Tee.Voe. I'm kind of ashamed of this, but it is a situation I can remedy.

7. I don't care for people who don't (or can't) think critically. It's okay not to have an opinion about everything, but those who have no opinion about anything? I believe those people to have limited intelligence, and I have little tolerance for such people.

8. Okay, Bob, I have to disagree with you on this one. My relationship with cats is complicated and I will write about it later. I don't think cats are dumb animals, but dogs are smarter, although I have seen some exceptions on both counts. I love kittens. Once they lose their innocence and become cats, not so much. I have a few scars I can show you, put there by my beloved Toby, who now resides with my son. Even with this, I still don't dislike cats, but dogs, while they're more maintenance, show unwavering, unconditional love. I am a dog person.

9. I have never witnessed the death of anyone. I imagine it to be emotional, very sad, and depending on the circumstances, possessing elements of beauty. I would be scared as hell to die right now. If it happened anytime soon, I'd like it put on record that I'd be pretty damn pissed.

10. I am a fantastic shower singer, and actually carry a decent tune. One of my childhood fantasies comes to life during this time and has remained unchanged for decades: I am a singing superstar in a slinky, sequined dress that compliments my caramel skin beautifully (yes, I thought this way as a child), sparkles coming from my fingers, my shoes, my earlobes, and in my perfectly coiffed hair. My top singing fantasies vacillate between this one and the one where I'm Chaka Khan. As a matter of fact, I was Chaka Khan just this morning, but I digress. In my fantasies, so outstanding is my voice it causes the audience to look up at me in awe, with pure loving adoration, and I love them right back.

11. I am true foodie, through to my soul. I love good food like I could love the right man, and no, I will not further this sentiment here. I love to cook and dare to say if I cooked for you, whoever you are, you would want little more than to be my bitch. I also appreciate the good food of others. Wine, chocolate, the sweet, the tangy, the savory, healthy, fresh, natural foods, I love it all, and the bad stuff, too, though not like I used to. I fear my love of food shall be my downfall.

12. I can't say I hate nuns, but I dislike them intensely. After 13 years of Catholic schools run by some of the most evil ones on this planet, I can't stand the image of them. Even now, when I pass one on the street I think to myself how lucky she is I don't carry around some hot lye to fling in her unsuspecting, whiskered face. Are there good nuns? I am sure there are, and the Blessed Mother Theresa stands alone, but I promise you, I have never personally known a nun who wasn't evil.

13. I was an extremely sensitive, shy, soft hearted child. I cried for days after seeing The Yearling. I was devastated after seeing Old Yeller. I still have a mushy soft spot, especially for animals, but now it is very, very small. Most of the softness of my childhood has turned hard as granite. This is a direct result of being kicked too many times, albeit figuratively.

14. The older I get, the less I care what people think of me. I'm real from the very beginning, and quite fabulous. If you don't recognize that, it's more than okay.

15. I am not photogenic, and have numerous complaints about my appearance, even though I'm cute. (Well I am!) That being said, I like my butt, love my lips. Won't embellish on this either.

16. As complicated as religion can be, in my mind and in my heart, the basic premise of Christianity is very simple. Anyone who calls themselves Christian is obligated to make every effort to live their life the way they believe Jesus would. Of course, humans fall from time to time, but at some point we must ask ourselves what Jesus would do. That being said, I don't believe He'd be too happy with some of the attitudes regarding the basic rights of humans, or the way we treat each other sometimes. There are people who walk around as if they can speak for God (and according to them He is hateful toward others), or that people have to answer to them. I wonder just who the fuck they think they are, deciding for other people, pretending their efforts are in his His name when they know in their hearts they're lying. I'd love to witness the day when these phony mouthpieces have to explain themselves to God.

17. I am a very complex person. I'm a girly girl who thinks like a man about a lot of things. Fiercely loyal, sensitive, yet sarcastic and sardonic. I can be generous with a total stranger, but there are some things about which I am unapologetically selfish. As sweet as I am, I can also be the meanest, coldest bitch alive if you wrong me or anyone I care about. I would have no compunction turning my back on you if you betray me. I'm pretty cool natured, yet feisty as hell. Most of the time I feel like I can do anything and I have the world on a string, but there are times I don't even feel worthy of leaving the house, lacking the confidence to do even regular stuff. Fortunately, these moments are few and far between.

18. I have such respect and admiration for intense, romantic, devoted love. It is sacred to me. I have not yet met the love of my life and it bothers me at times, but I will. When I do, we will both know how very, very fortunate we are. Our love will be exponential, spilling onto everyone around us.

19. I absolutely love funny people because baaaaby, I am one funny chica. While I love to laugh, you don't have to be funny to be my friend, but I think you have to get my sense of humor. It's not very hard. What do you think?

Well, there you have it. I just shared 19 pieces of me. Why nineteen? It's my favorite number, but I guess this disclosure makes it 20 pieces. Isn't that just like me?

Does this Count as a Post?

Okay, I was sick of seeing that woman's crack, as I am sure many of you are. Bad enough I had to see it in real life. Honestly, it's no way to greet my fantastic visitors. Problem is, I don't have time to post right this second. So, feast your eyes on this until I can post properly. Enjoy!

To Whom it May Concern:

When one is dining in a restaurant, or anywhere for that matter, one does not want to see this. Thank you in advance.